Becoming a Mom

Becoming a mom is perhaps as simple and as complex as it could be. You become a mom "simply" by having a baby. Yet becoming a mom is a process that is very complex and every woman that has been there (whether by birth or adoption) could say much about what it was like then, and what it might look like even years down the path. 



Becoming a mom tends to kind of happen to us. But becoming a good mom usually takes a lot of conscious work. After all, we have a lot to learn about what it will take to care for a newborn, then a toddler, a preschooler, etc...I won't even go into the teen years and young adulthood, because I'm not even there yet, and I happy I am where I am! (If however you became a mom by adopting an older child, I salute you!) 

Maybe you feel incredibly filled with joy! And maybe at the thought of everything that's about to happen with a new life in the house, that new precious life in your arms, you might feel overwhelmed. The good news is that you don't have to prepare yourself for parenting a teenager if you have a little one. All you have to do, is be a parent to your child exactly where they are in life, at their age right now. 

I used to feel overwhelmed at the thought of having kids before I was married (even though I dreamed my whole life about having a family!), because my experience with kids was usually with preschoolers - 2nd graders. I didn't try to put myself into these situations but they just somehow happened to me. I never knew how to handle kids, their temper annoyed me, their mess disgusted me, and having to be around them, quite frankly, scared me. When they acted out, I was tough with them. Somehow though, they always found their way to me and seemed to like me, and definitely made me love them back. 

Because of this experience though, after I married, I was nervous about having my own children. Little did I realize that when one day I give birth, it won't be to a dramatic 5 year old, but to a little baby. When I finally got there and I had my firstborn, I was fascinated with how incredibly simple it was to care for my son, even if it was really hard at times. He was a newborn. And a newborn is completely different from a 5 year old. I only had to learn how to hold him, how to feed him, how to love on him, how to change his diapers, how to give him a bath, how to take care of his skin and his belly button, and how to get used to a new sleeping pattern. And then how to take care of me (which is a whole other thing!). But I didn't have to worry about the emotional drama that comes later, I didn't have to grow in my patience over the constant "Mommy!" and "Why?" and "I don't want to!" that I now hear multiple times every day. 

I look at it, and I feel so blessed that this is how it works. And that God doesn't put on us more than what we can handle. He gives us a little one, and He adds to our responsibility over someone else's life little by little. Our joy and our challenges grow and change with their age. Our struggles too. But so does love. I feel like until I had my first, I didn't know it was possible to love someone like that, and like I didn't even know what love truly was until I had him. It completed me in a way I never thought was possible. It filled me and it overflowed. And that's really amazing, because these next five years, as much as every phase is different and has new challenges, my love is set firm and is a foundation for everything that we come to deal with. 

Looking at it from a Christian stand point, it is clear: Children are a blessing from the Lord! God meant them for good, and we can always have hope that He knows what He's doing and that He will always give us exactly what we need to make it through, every day, every stage, every phase of this life.

So today I would like to encourage you with a few passages that speak to me and have spoken to me from the first day of my motherhood. These Bible verses offered joy, security, conviction, challenge and hope. They gave my heart wings to sore, grew me in understanding and determination, and when I crumbled, they lifted me off the ground. And even when I fell into the pit, they helped to deliver me. I hope you can find what you need in them today. 

1. Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from Him. - Psalm 127:3. 

2. Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it. - Proverbs 22:6

3. Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. - 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

4. Be anxious for nothing but in everything, by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known unto God, and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. - Philippians 4:6

5. "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." - Matthew 11:28

6. Let your speech always be gracious. - Colossians 4:5

7. Love is patient, love is kind. - 1 Corinthians 13:4

8. Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and beloved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. - Colossians 3:12

9. Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the desires of the flesh. - Galatians 5:16

10. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. - Philippians 3:14


I hope you can be encouraged, wherever you are right now.
My prayer for you today is that you could find your peace and joy in the Lord and let go of your worries. 


In Christ,

Kate Holloman